Stole
by S.J.Stevens
Summary: Everybody wants Shikamaru. At a party for Tenten, Ino and Temari fight over Shikamaru. But they aren't the only girls who have their eyes on Konoha's lazy genius. Who will win his heart? Shika/Ino/Temari/Hinata. LET THE BATTLE BEGIN!


**Authors Note****:**

**-Disclaimer: Naruto and it's wonderful characters belong to Masahi Kishimoto.**

-Here is my second ever fanfic! Don't worry, I'm still working on "I Didn't Know You The" and should have the next chapter (ch. 5) up by Friday. This fanfic is a humor/romance story inspired by my three favorite Shikamaru pairings & my newest Shikamaru pairing love(hint: it's a crack pairing).

-Thank you to SpammishRice (on Deviant Art) who made me fall in love with this particular crack pairing. I loves it!

--

Stole

Chapter 1

Shikamaru stumbled backwards, the ferocity of the two arguing blondes being more than he could stand up close. Why on earth his teammate, Ino, and their friend from the sand, Temari, felt the need to make a scene and argue any time the three of them ended up somewhere together was beyond him. They fought over everything from who got to sit next to him in the booth at the barbeque restaurant, to who he would walk home at the end of the night, -everything! He was willing to admit that both girls were insanely attractive, but he'd rather be stuck hanging out with Konoha's hyper-active knucklehead ninja, Naruto, than deal with how troublesome these broads were.

A small crowd had formed around the girls, who were shouting and getting very close to throwing punches and pulling hair. Shikamaru sighed deeply and backed out through the gaggle of idiotic partygoers. It was Tenten's 16th birthday. Shikamaru was surprised at how many people had shown up. But, he figured, Tenten was a lot less troublesome then the blondes whose company he had just left, so she really kind of deserved more friends. Shikamaru shook his head sadly. He almost wished Tenten wasn't with Neji. Not that he was crazy about the girl or anything, but she was just so… not a pain in the ass. She didn't yell as far as he knew, though Lee had claimed otherwise. She wasn't a gorgeous girl, but she wasn't ugly. She was just so normal. Shikamaru wondered vaguely if perhaps Tenten had a sister. Or a cousin. Or any female relative who was available and willing to rescue him from the two forces of nature now yelling so loud he could hear them halfway across the house.

Shikamaru paused in the doorway of the kitchen. He could see out the backdoor and was so very tempted to make a run for it. He wondered how long it would take for Ino and Temari to realize that their prey had slipped away during their argument. He had barely taken two steps toward the partially open door when, from across the house, he heard the call of his impending doom…

"Shika-kun!" Ino's voice rang out.

Apparently the argument was over, undoubtedly because either Sakura or Tenten had stepped in and intervened before the girls started using their ninjutsus in the house. Shikamaru groaned, but relented. He knew better then to run when one of the troublesome duo was calling for him. He walked as slowly as possible back to the living room. Everything was back to normal there. The furniture that had been knocked around had been put back into it's proper place. The broken lamp had been swept up. The crowd had, for the most part, dispersed. Now, there was a circle of his friends and a few people he didn't really know sitting on the floor. There was Kiba, Naruto, Ino, Sakura, Lee, Tenten, Neji, Temari, a girl with long purplish hair, a boy with chin length brown hair, Chouji, and Hinata. Both Hinata and Neji didn't look very happy to be there, but there teammates were doing a pretty good job of keeping them from leaving.

"Sit down Shika-kun, we're gonna play a game." Ino cooed mischievously.

"And what game is that?" He asked, taking a seat between Kiba and Naruto.

"7 minutes in heaven," She replied with a devilish grin. Shikamaru immediately made to stand, but was grabbed by Naruto and Kiba. Everyone got a good laugh out of Shikamaru's failed attempt to escape. Ino placed a bottle in the middle of the circle and motioned for Tenten to go first since it was her birthday. Tenten gave the bottle a good spin. Sitting on Tenten's right, Neji gave the bottle his most powerful glare, as if daring it to point at someone other than him. The bottle slowed and was just about to come to a stop in front of Lee, who was sitting right next to Neji, when Neji's leg shot out in front of Lee. The bottle was now stopped, pointing at both Lee and Neji's leg. No one moved.

"Oh look," Neji drawled in a monotone voice, "It's pointing at me. What were the odds?"

He glanced around the circle, his fierce glare once again daring anyone to disagree with him. He then stood and proceeded to leave the room. Tenten rolled her eyes, but got up and followed him none the less. As soon as they had left the room, the remaining members of the circle laughed. Neji was such a tight wad. It was now Chouji's turn. The bottle spun and stopped on the girl with long purple hair, whose name Shikamaru didn't know. He smirked at his best friend as Chouji's face turned red. He and the girl got up and made for a room down the hall. It was Ino's turn now. She gave Shikamaru a small wink before spinning the bottle. When the bottled slowed and finally stopped, Shikamaru was pretty sure that she had cheated somehow. The bottle was pointing at him.

Shikamaru sighed as Ino jumped up and grabbed him by the front of his vest, dragging him down the hall. He was pushed roughly into the bathroom. Ino closed the door behind her and immediately attached herself to Shikamaru's face. He stumbled backwards, his back hitting the wall. He allowed himself to fall to the floor, Ino taking the opportunity to climb onto his lap. While Shikamaru often found Ino annoying, bossy, aggressive, possessive, and a million other troublesome things, he wasn't going to deny that she was good at kissing. And she was pretty damn good with her hands too. By the time that their 7 minutes was up, Shikamaru was lying on his back, both his vest and shirt removed, his hair pulled out of it's tie, and smudges of Ino's sticky lip gloss covering anywhere that there was bare skin. Ino grinned proudly as she watched Shikamaru take a minute to clean himself up and re-dress. When he was done, Ino led him by the hand back to the circle. Tenten and Neji had apparently decided to extend their 7 minutes to 30 minutes, and so they were not there when Shikamaru returned. Chouji and the purple haired girl were back though, and Shikamaru grinned when he noticed both of them shooting each small smiles every few minutes.

Ino sat down and pulled Shikamaru down next to her. Sakura spun the bottle and looked slightly horrified when it stopped on Kiba. Naruto growled at the dog user, but Kiba ignored him, choosing instead to grin at Sakura. He jumped up from his spot, slung Sakura over his shoulder, and took off. Everyone sat in shock for a moment as Naruto took off after them. After the shock wore off, the group spent the next five minutes laughing and wondering who would come back alive, or if Sakura would just pound the both of them to death. The next to spin the bottle was Temari. When it landed pointing on him, Shikamaru was certain that both blondes had found a way to cheat. Ino's face turned red from rage as Temari, leaning down to grab Shikamaru's hand, whispered "stole" in her ear. Before the angry blonde could react, Temari had pulled Shikamaru around the corner and out of sight.

Temari led him to the empty bedroom and shoved him down on the bed. She wasted no time, seating herself on his lap and beginning to move in a way that made him forget all of his annoyances. Temari was older and definitely more experienced than any of the other girls who chased him around. He didn't doubt for a second that she could make him forget his name if she wanted to. But at this moment, she seemed content to take it slow. Agonizing slow. Temari wasn't the type to just give. She had to make him want it first, to the point where he would beg. Another minute of her movements and Shikamaru was more than willing to beg. And then some.

After what seemed like only a few minutes, Temari and Shikamaru were interrupted by someone pounding on the bedroom door. It was Kiba. Apparently, they'd been in the room for over ten minutes and Kiba had agreed to come and get them to keep Ino from throwing an absolute fit. Shikamaru, once again, cleaned himself up before being led by Temari's hand out to the main room. Everyone was back in the circle. They arrived in time to see Naruto spin the bottle and have it land on Kiba. Everyone in the circle broke out into hysterical laughter as the boys faces turned white as a sheet. Everyone except Ino, that is. Her face was red and she glared at Temari with barely suppressed blood lust. Temari took her seat and was about to pull him down next to her when he slipped his hand out of her grasp.

"I'm, uh… I'm gonna go get a drink. I need a break from this game. I'll grab you one too, ok?" Shikamaru said.

"Ok," Temari replied amiably.

"Oh, Shika, could you get me one too?" Ino asked sweetly, giving him puppy dog eyes.

"Yeah, of course." he replied quickly.

He ducked out of room just in time to avoid coming between another one of Ino and Temari's arguments. He walked into the kitchen, opened the fridge, and grabbed two drinks.

"Need help with the drinks?" Chouji asked, coming into the room with Hinata right behind him.

"Nah, I was actually gonna ask someone else to take them to the girls so I could hightail it out of here." Shikamaru said, scowling. Hinata giggled and then turned serious.

"Yeah, I'm leaving too. That game is just… well- I just…" Hinata paused, catching her breath, "I really didn't want to play to begin with. Everyone left playing is at least partially crazy."

Shikamaru and Chouji laughed. Chouji took the drinks into the living room, along with a message to the girls telling them Shikamaru was tired and he'd see them tomorrow. Shikamaru and Hinata were left alone in the kitchen.

"Well, I'd better get going before those two harpies come after me." Shikamaru said.

"Um, Shikamaru-kun? Do you- Would you mind if I walked with you? My house is a ways from here and it gets boring walking alone." Hinata said meekly. Shikamaru paused for a moment before replying.

"Yeah, sure. I'll walk you home." Hinata smiled and they headed out the door. They'd only taken a few steps before Hinata stop and excused herself, saying that she needed to get something she'd left in Tenten's house. Shikamaru waited for her. Hinata came back holding two drinks.

"I thought I forgot my purse, but I had it on my shoulder the whole time." she blushed, handing Shikamaru one of the drinks.. "So, I got us each something to drink."

"Thanks." Shikamaru replied. He didn't mind waiting. In all honesty, Hinata was the least annoying girl he knew. She still stuttered occasionally, but she gotten over a lot of her shyness. She was always polite, never loud, bossy, or aggressive, and to top it off, puberty had been very kind to her. Shikamaru snuck a glance, looking Hinata up and down out of the corner of his eye. Puberty had been very kind indeed. Shikamaru briefly wondered if Hinata had gotten over her crush on Naruto, before he shook himself from his thoughts. He wasn't about to stir something up with another girl, but if Hinata wanted him he'd be more than happy to hand himself over on a silver platter. Shikamaru snuck another glance. Well, maybe he would throw out a line sometime and see if the pretty Hyuuga heir took the bait. Maybe a little extra trouble would be worth it, he thought, grinning unconsciously.

--

Ino and Temari groaned, getting up from their spots on the floor. It had been over half an hour since Shikamaru left and they were both bored. The girls caught each others eye and sighed. There was no need for competition now that the prize was gone. Both girls headed to the front door, where they had left their shoes. They were surprised to find a small piece of paper folded and sitting on top of each of their shoes. The girls each picked up their piece of paper and unfolded. Their eyes widened in shock. Nothing could have prepared them for what they saw. For there, written in the elegant handwriting of the most timid and reserved girl they knew, was the single word "STOLE."

--

**Authors Note****:**

Burn bitches!! MUWAHAHA! Anyways… So, I've gotten some really nice reviews and pretty much all of them have said I should continue this, so I think I will. :D I'm gonna turn this into a chapter story. I'll probably start the next chapter this weekend.

P.S.- Reviews are appreciated!


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